12:28: The red carpet is finally over and I have put together my gallery of the most glamorous gowns and absolutely shocking frocks.
11:53am: Hillary Swank
She looks gorgeous in this hot, one-shouldered, Versace black gown. It has a sheer neckline and lace applique on it. The hair is a little bit old for my liking —an oldish French roll. It would have been nice if she had a slightly more of a modern approarch to her hair.
11:51am: Calista Flockhart and her grandfather
She's looking a bit scary.
11:48am: Casey Affleck
I like the look of the tie with a tuxedo. He's looking really sharp.
11:48am: Colin Farrell
I quite like a bad boy dressing up for a red carpet event. He's got a better blow dry than Cameron Diaz. And his Mum (who he's brought as his date), looks hot! Helen Mirren should take a few tips from her. NOTE: so far it's been the most appalling year for hair. They need to fly Jo Bailey over STAT.
11:40am: Tilda Swinton
It's a great big bag — what's to like? Don't put any make-up on you, albino! But I do love her, she is such a great actress.
11:39am: Marion Cotillard
This is
The Little Mermaid previously mentioned in Jean Paul Gaultier. Pretty tricky for my liking, with all the scales and everything. I'm getting a fishy vibe.
11:37am: Cameron Diaz
Just rolled out of bed and onto the red carpet. Appalling hair — she bypassed the hairdresser and put it back in a ponytail. Regrowth needs attention and she's not wearing
any make-up. You can get away with that when you're 16, but not when you're hedging 40. And it's a brave woman who puts extra fabric on her hips. In my opinion, no-one is
that pretty.
11:35am: Jennifer Hudson
She just unleashed a white gladiator dress. Unfortunately, the white jersey couldn't contain her boobs. They look like white pointers — one to the east and one to the west.
11:33am:Jessica Alba
She always looks gorgeous. Her make-up is flawless —she just gets it right. She's wearing Marchesa with Cartier jewels. This is the same designer as Anne Hathaway is wearing. Really modern couture.
11:32am:Helen Mirren
I can't believe I'm seeing a dress that is red satin with white lace. It's not friggin' Christmas, honey. And she looked so amazing last year, but this year she looks
wrong.
11:26am:Maryann Contillario(sic)
You are channelling
The Little Mermaid. Newsflash, honey — you're about 15 years off.
11:26am:General hair comment
They're all trying to do Jessica Alba from two years ago when she had perfect hair and a Versace dress, and there are various levels of it from good to appalling.
11:26am:Jennifer Garner part 2
See, I think the bottom of the dress is really gorgeous. I didn't see that before. It has a Spanish Balenciaga feel to it. Waist down, she's hot. Waist up, not so hot. I think she's one of the crowd who's playing it safe.
11:23am:P Diddy
P Diddy always looks cool, really sharp with a great waistcoat underneath the tuxedo. He is the modern movie star.
11:20am:Keri Russell
She's got horizontal cleavage and has been to the same hairdresser as Jennifer Garner. They
so don't know how to fit a dress over there. I've got a real issue with it not fitting right. Her dress is puckering. Quality, sweetie, quality!
11:17am:Jennifer Garner
Jennifer has a nana hair-do that looks like it's falling out — it's a floppy old bun with bits hanging out of it. Then she's got a black strapless dress and if you wear that it needs to fit properly not like this one. It's pressing down on her boobs giving her horizontal, side cleavage. Not as easy to wear strapless after you've breast-feed. It's all about the fit, sweetie!
11:08am:Amy Adams
Her dress is lovely with classic sweetheart neckline and looks nice, could be a bit more pizzazz though. It's not setting me alight.
11:08am:Jessica Alba
Jessica wins the f---ing gorgeous, pregnant woman award. She looks divine in a strapless, black, empire-line dress with feathered detail over her sensational bosom.
11:05am:Kelly Preston
Kelly is looking fabulous in a beautiful, strapless tangerine dress. She's not too trussed up and has simple hair — loosely pinned up but out and really flattering. She hasn't tried too hard. Kelly outshines her hubby. John Travolta has a droopy suit on and too long sideburns, slightly Amish looking.
11:02am: Patrick Dempsey
McDreamy and Mrs are on the carpet and looking gorgeous. He looks fantastic. I mean, he can wear a paper bag and look good. He's channelling Rock Hudson and his wife is wearing a boring dress. It's like
rice — a filler, nothing to write home about.
10:53am: Anne Hathaway
Red is the colour tonight and Anne Hathaway looks gorgeous. She is in a beautiful, one-shoulder dress and I'm tipping it's Valentino. I also love the high-volume ponytail. She is flawless.
10:25am: George Clooney
Old Hollywood glamour, George looks gorgeous in the classic tux with spot on hair. And his best accessory — a mute, beautiful-looking girlfriend.
10:22am: Red gone wrong
Okay here is the first dress on the carpet, Heidi Klum in some weird kinda red dress. She looks like Dracula's daughter.
10:10am: Bling alert
Kimora Lee Simmons is wearing
a lot of bling. She's got on a pretty plain Jane black frock but so many diamonds, I'm a bit surprised she can stand up. There's a major necklace, diamond wristlets — they're so big and she's got a huge diamond hair clip. As completely over-the-top as her
E! show.
10:00am: Setting the scene
It is looking cold and wet on the red carpet, thank
God they've got most of it undercover. We're waiting, waiting for the stars and their matching goosebumps. It looks cooooolllldddd!
